he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
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He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
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You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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