So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
party gras won. party gras always wins.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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