like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I think a kid would responsible me up
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
