You just made me feel so damn special
I wish I could punch you in the face.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
