thus making me awesome and them whores
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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