I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize