My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
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