I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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