Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
