He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
