what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
