I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
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It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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