Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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