never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
