weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
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