sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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