I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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