seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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