mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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