She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
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