Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Randomize
