Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
