yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize