I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
