jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
