She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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