That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I think my fart just growled at me.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Randomize
