It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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