marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Randomize
