if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
