9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize