just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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