I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
You were trust falling into bushes
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