So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
My balls are so social today.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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