he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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