He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
the liver wants what the liver wants
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize