so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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