If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
