So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
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