Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
i think i just lost a toe
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
