I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
