We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize