I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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