the new term for farting is butt boxing.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
