I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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