Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
