And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
