we made out on top of his cat.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
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