Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
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he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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