so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize