Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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